Dr. Dana's Help with Trusting Your Spouse
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Video Transcript - Dr. Dana's Help to Trust Your Spouse
Hi, I’m Dr. Dana. Thanks for taking our survey! The results indicated that your relationship may be suffering from a lack of trust. You know, losing trust in a relationship can occur for so many different reasons, but in all cases the solution to beginning to rebuild trust is for the injured party to feel truly heard and understood. This requires their partner to actually listen to them.
But why is listening so important to restoring trust? Why does it make such a difference in a relationship? Because nothing is ever resolved until somebody listens.
Is there a topic that keeps coming up over and over again in your relationship? Is she still talking about that time you got too drunk back in college? Is he still talking about that time you talked to an old boyfriend? The reason for this is that the person who was hurt by the incident, never felt truly heard each time the topic was brought up and therefore does not trust that it won’t happen again. You may have spoken about it 20 times; you may have apologized repeatedly, you may have explained yourself, even promised never to do it again. So why does it keep coming up? Why can’t they trust you? Because the other person is still bothered by it and will continue to bring it up, over and over, until they feel like you get it – not necessarily agree with them --- but truly understand how they feel about it. They are waiting for you to have that “A-Ha” moment before they can trust it will not happen again. And you can never have that “A-ha” moment if you don’t listen.
So, if you’d like to improve the trust in your relationship and resolve issues, take the time to truly listen and understand your partner. Interestingly, a pleasant side-effect of patiently listening to your partner is that they’ll be more likely to listen and trust you!
To learn more important skills necessary to safeguard your marriage from an affair, sign up to listen to our FREE webinar, “5 Secrets to Save Your Marriage.” Just click on the button below to register today. Don’t wait a minute longer to start rebuilding the trust and, therefore, the connection in your marriage.
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